Jackie Kaines Lang, Northumberland
I was diagnosed with stage 3 bowel cancer in October 2015 aged 53 and now I'm running a 10k race to celebrate my 60th birthday.
My symptoms started with loose stools which I had consistently for many months. I also had two occurrences of rectal bleeds a year apart. I was tired (I now realise very tired) – but aren't we all! Mainly, it was the fact that I had not done a solid poo for ages and ages that made me go to the GP.
I had checked out bowel cancer on the NHS website a couple of times – so it was on my mind when thinking about symptoms. However, I had been reassured by the suggestion that in most cases my symptoms would not lead to a diagnosis of bowel cancer – also that most people with bowel cancer are older than me. I have to say that my lived experience does not confirm this – only one person I've met who's had bowel cancer has been over 60 and I have met many people with it.
My GP was lovely, patient and kind in what could easily have become a very embarrassing consultation for me. She gave me a rectal examination and felt my tummy and it all felt very calm and natural. We also talked about my symptoms. She did not think I had anything to worry about but sent me for the flexible sigmoidoscopy which led to my diagnosis. It all happened in a few weeks which was brilliant.
I had a bowel resection in December 2015. It was open abdominal surgery and recovery took some time. I wasn't worried about my physical appearance, but it took a long time to get over the operation and rebuild strength particularly as I then went onto chemotherapy.
Chemotherapy started in February 2016 and ended in August 2016. It is one of the most difficult and brutal treatments I have experienced. I found it psychologically and physically exhausting. Having said that, I also found activities that I'd once found a drudgery – such as gardening – uplifting. For me, I think it was about engaging in an activity that encompasses a rhythm of life and death and rebirth whilst simultaneously going through this all-encompassing life event.
My aunt had bowel cancer and sadly passed away in her early 40s. I told my GP and my consultant. My consultant explained that this does not constitute a genetic predisposition to the disease. However, he also suggested that both my daughters get colonoscopies when they turn 35: I think I'll treat them for their birthdays!
In some ways I experience life more intensely post bowel cancer – I try to live in the moment and to actively engage in things I enjoy or that will be beneficial and life-enhancing to me and others. I do think that once you've had a disease such as bowel cancer it lives alongside you always in some shape or form. For me, the possibility of it coming back is always just there on the perimeter of my mind. As time passes, this has diminished – or perhaps I've become more adept at managing and balancing that anxiety.
I turn 60 this year and, as a way of celebrating this personal landmark and my own good health, I've signed up to run the Edinburgh 10k. I've never run this far before and it feels daunting and exciting.
To support Jackie please visit her JustGiving page.